My Autumn Goals.

Hey there guys, I'm sat here on this Monday night, just thinking about things, about life and the person I am. I have made a few mistakes lately and I feel like I'm letting myself go, like I'm not doing the best I could, and like I've kind have let myself adrift, and not putting as much effort into things and life as I should. You know when someone is talking to you about how you are and what you have done, and when you see things through their perspective you kinda realise how things aren't as what you expected or thought? Well that's kinda happened to me tonight, I don't want to go into too much detail but after having a long conversation with someone very close to me, I've realised that the person I am right now, is not the best I can be. I had a little moment, cried a few tears and felt sorry for myself (yep, I do that a lot *embarrassed face*), but you know, you gotta have a little meltdown now and then. Things in life aren't always going to go to plan, which I have realised in these last couple of months, and you're not always going to be the best you can be, because sometimes things get to you and you just feel like giving up and putting no effort into things.. Sometimes you don't even realise that this is happening to you until someone who is very often around you, tells you these things. Yeah at first it's going to get to you (I mean come'on, who likes being told that they aren't at their best) but it really does make you realise and think good and hard about things, and this often leads to a new and better step in your life. 

So yeah, after this event happening, I have been thinking long and hard about me, and my life and I've realised that their is a few things I want to change in these last few months of 2014. So this is why I am here, writing on my blog. I am going to write down 6 things I want to change or do this Autumn.

♥

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1. Listen more to people. I have this habit where half the time I guess I don't listen to what people have to say (not like a conversation or anything but when it comes to ideas or plans or something like that) and I always tell myself 'Nah, I know what I'm doing, don't need to be told what to do', when in the end, what I was thinking screws up, doesn't go to plan and makes things worse. Yes, I hate myself for it and that's why I want to change it.

2. Put more effort into making my boyfriend feel special. (Sorry guys about the lovey dovey stuff haha). Now I know my boyfriend knows that I love him, more than anything in this world, and I tell him all the time and cuddle him and everything else, but lately I haven't really been putting much effort into doing other stuff to make him feel special to me, like surprising him with little gifts or taking him out for lunch, dinner, picnics, whatever, but I think you guys get the picture, and so my goal for this autumn is to do more for my boyfriend, like taking him out for a meal, planning a nice cosy evening together or even little things like making him drinks and making him his lunch or breakfast in bed or anything like that, I think it would mean a lot to him, so that is what I am going to do!

3. My third goal is pretty much like the last one, but it's treating my boyfriend to a gift or surprise every couple of days. Now we talked about this a few months back after moving out of our old apartment. We said that when we get out new one we would treat eachother to little surprises every few days, just so there's that little presence of how much we love and know eachother there. We said it doesn't have to be anything big, we could just simply listen out to what each other is saying and feeling like if he said 'ouh I'm really stressed out after a long hard days work' I'd be like mhm, I think a nice little bottle of beer and a nice film would cheer him up, so I would waddle off (yes, waddle, I am a duck) to the shop, grab his favourite beer, maybe a packet of crisps or pop corn and then come back, pick a funny film that we haven't seen before and get in bed and watch it. 

4. Have more pamper evenings. Now I don't often have these even though I wish I could have them every week. I just get a bit lazy and feel like I don't have enough time for these with university and stuff. (don't have an excuse for summer time though girl!) I don't think I really need any in the summer to be honest as I just find that it's too hot to have a nice relaxing bath, I would rather just have a nice warm shower instead. I think that Autumn is a great time to have nice pamper evenings.. Nice hot relaxing bubble bath with some chilled out music on, a nice soothing face mask, flickering candles.. mhm I can't wait haha! With the colder weather coming and university I think this would be great. I am in need of these nights very soon as I get very stressed out when it comes to university. 

5. Fourth one, start a YouTube Channel. Now I have been wanting to start one for so long now, I have been watching videos since I was at least 15 so for about four years now and I am addicted haha. I have been so inspired by so many Youtubers and there has been many a times where I have got my camera out when no one is around, filmed a video, edited it and never uploaded. I just pull out right at the last second, I don't know why, I guess it's just because I feel like it's not good enough or that no one will like or watch it.. I think the idea of Youtube is great, you can find so many different and amazing or funny content on there and watching videos does make me feel happy when I'm feeling a bit down, and I would love to be able to be that or do that to someone else to. The problem is I am quite a shy person, not very confident, and I just put myself down and think that I will never be good enough. I want to make videos to boost my confidence and get over my 'being shy' thing that I have, I hate it. So, this autumn, I am determined to pick up my camera and film a video and upload it, without fail! My boyfriend has recently started a Youtube Channel (Here) and it has inspired me to do mine. So, hopefully in the next couple of months you will see a blog post on here with a link to my very first video! 

6. My very last one for now, is just to tell all the people close to me how much I appreciate them and how much they mean to me. I think everyone should do this, tell people how much they mean to you, tell them how much you appreciate what they do for you, because I am sure that will put a big smile on their face and you always tell them this before it's too late. I am going to tell people how much I appreciate everything they do for me and make sure that I tell them everyday how much they mean to me and make me smile (say 'cheeeeese'! Only kidding!) because I feel like I don't do that enough and doing this will also make me a much happier person I believe.. ♥

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There you go guys, there is my little list of goals this Autumn, I could probably write and think of more but I am going to end it there for now. Maybe I will do a follow up on it, maybe I won't. But I hope you guys liked it and I would love to know 1 of your goals this Autumn so let me know in a comment if you would like to. :)